Money, sex and arguments are at the root of most couples' discontent. Susan Quilliam tackles the most common relationship problems
My partner's having an affair. Is this the end of our relationship?
'I've discovered my husband's been unfaithful with one of our closest friends. The past few days have been a horrendous mixture of rows, tears and recriminations. He says he still loves me, and I still love him, but everyone I know tells me to just walk away. Is there any hope for us?'
Lisa
Infidelity doesn't have to spell the end for a relationship. Yes, some partners have affairs because they want out of the relationship, but for most people, an affair is a wake-up call. It's a signal that they're not happy, but if the relationship changed they would stay. In some cases, a relationship is strengthened by an affair as both partners have had to face and work through the problems in their relationship.
Affair action plan
News that your partner has had an affair will shock. Don't make any hasty decisions about your future, however much other people pressure you to do so.
Your partner needs to agree to stop seeing his (or her) lover - if they refuse, walk away.
Once you're over the shock and can talk calmly with your partner, try and talk through the reasons for the infidelity.
Think about the question: what needs to change in your relationship for infidelity never to happen again?
Couples counselling can provide a neutral and supportive environment to talk these difficult issues through.
My partner's having an affair. Is this the end of our relationship?
'I've discovered my husband's been unfaithful with one of our closest friends. The past few days have been a horrendous mixture of rows, tears and recriminations. He says he still loves me, and I still love him, but everyone I know tells me to just walk away. Is there any hope for us?'Lisa
Infidelity doesn't have to spell the end for a relationship. Yes, some partners have affairs because they want out of the relationship, but for most people, an affair is a wake-up call. It's a signal that they're not happy, but if the relationship changed they would stay. In some cases, a relationship is strengthened by an affair as both partners have had to face and work through the problems in their relationship.
Affair action plan
News that your partner has had an affair will shock. Don't make any hasty decisions about your future, however much other people pressure you to do so.
Your partner needs to agree to stop seeing his (or her) lover - if they refuse, walk away.
Once you're over the shock and can talk calmly with your partner, try and talk through the reasons for the infidelity.
Think about the question: what needs to change in your relationship for infidelity never to happen again?
Couples counselling can provide a neutral and supportive environment to talk these difficult issues through.
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